Freedom

Yesterday, I read A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini. I read his first book The Kite Runner almost a year back, thanks to my younger brother who recommended it to me. I have to admit that Hosseini's first book almost had me in tears by the time I finished reading it. The second book ends on a rather hopeful note, but barring the last few chapters you will go through the same heart-wrenching experience reading it. Hosseini manages to build on the real backdrop of the devastating three decades of war in Afghanistan, characters which are fictional but linger in the boundary of realm. That is why you feel an emotional connection with the protagonists in both the books. I do not possess the talent to be able to express the actual experience of reading these books in words, so I will leave it at this point.

There is one aspect that of the books which has made me think a lot, that being the situation in Afghanistan. Hosseini puts it in words so effectively that you can actually visualise it. Most of it is true and you might have read the same in a rather mundane fashion in the news reports. Reading about the mass devastation in Afghanistan helped me realize how fortunate I happen to be to have been born in a free nation. People in Afghanistan have been deprived of all the advances the rest of the world has made in the last three decades. The only advancement they have experienced has ironically been in the weapons of mass destruction, which has only aggravated the situation there over the years. In the same period, India has enjoyed democracy and peace at large which has helped her move swiftly on the path of progress. I will admit that there are flaws in the Indian system, but the net outcome of these three decades has been on the positive side and it has to be attributed - at least partially - to the democratic system which has survived for sixty years.

Afghanistan saw lot of restrictions, oppression of human rights - particularly of women in all the years it was at war. The Taliban regimen even gagged the entire media and forced restrictions which were completely inhumane. Can you imagine a man being beaten brutally just because he was not wearing a turban, or was clean shaved, or had a TV set at his home, or missed a prayer, or was carrying/reading a book that was not Koran, or a woman being beaten just because she was wearing jewellery, or was not accompanied by a man on the road? It is astonishing how the people in Afghanistan survived all this brutality. On the other hand, I have enjoyed access to all kinds of media, all the books I wanted to read, pursue a lifestyle I liked (by and large). I can express my views freely on any matter that interests me (again by and large). This has been possible because people have stood against any attempt of enforcing such unjust rules, like in the case of the 1977 emergency. Democracy has helped India build the large middle class it has, which contributes the most towards development in all sectors.

Afghanistan is now back on the democratic path and they will definitely see the fruits if they persist with the system. India has to continue to do the same. Lot of people from the older generations, particularly those who were born before independence, fear that the younger generations take freedom for granted. Well, I fully understand the value of freedom - even more so after reading about Afghanistan - and I know what a privilege it is to live in a free India. I am also confident that a majority of Indian youth thinks the same way. All we have to do is guard against the section of people who target and attack specific communities, attack the fundamental right of freedom of expression. If we can collectively keep them at bay, Indian democracy will never be in trouble.

The scene from Chak De India is still fresh in my mind, where the coach refuses to accept the representation of different states from the players. What he insists on is the representation of India, forgetting the individual states it comprises of. That is what needs to be emulated. Forget about the castes, communities, states and think India.
Freedom has cost us a fortune and we can't let these small issues snatch it from us!

Listen!

That's what you should do when someone is talking to you - listen, and not just that - listen actively. For otherwise you are wasting time - not just your own, but the speaker's too. It then doesn't matter if the conversation is one-to-one or a speech or lecture or a group discussion. What one gains from these interactions is directly proportional to the intensity of listening. It's wonderful if one likes to talk, because that means one has the opportunity to have many such interactions, but it's equally important to allow others to talk and listen to them if there is to be a net positive from every interaction.

Active listening is probably the best tool for gaining knowledge for an average human being. I say that because it is difficult for everyone to be a voracious reader, that's the domain of scholars. They can easily pick up a book on a topic they want to know about and read through it in one go. Not everyone can do this and not everyone knows about everything too. So, if one is not in the class of voracious readers, one has to look for other avenues of gaining knowledge. More often than not, a person can only be very good at or knowledgeable about one or two topics or subjects and has limitations in all other areas. It can then prove very effective if you can get a person to talk about something you want to know but can't take the efforts on your own. Active listening can get people talking.

When you listen, it shows that you respect the thoughts of the speaker and that you are ready to accept them. The intensity of your listening assures the speaker to go on, give away more information than one is willing to. When one listens it makes the other more comfortable with the expression of his thoughts and to pass on more information than has been asked for. When you concentrate on what is being spoken you understand it many times better than you would if you were to read the same stuff.

And there is more to listening than just being a tool to gain knowledge. One's capacities of listening will determine how many people he conncets with. You may wonder how a seemingly passive activity like listening can determine this, but then who said listening is a passive activity. All you have to show when you listen to someone is that you are interested and people will pour their hearts out. When your eyes glow with delight when somebody shares his happiness with you, or when your face is covered with concern when somebody shares his problem with you, that is active listening. If you show that you care about and appreciate whatever the other person has to say you would have made his day.

Nothing would summarize this article better than what the Thought of the Day calendar (probably the silliest thing I have ever bought, and ironically that is what catches everyone's attention on my desk first) on my desk read today. "You can please more people by listening to them than by talking to them"